Dear You...

You know who you are. You know very well. And you know exactly what it is that you've done to hurt me.

Day in and day out, you find a new way to bring me down. With every passing week, it seems that you have discovered a new way to block out any of the good things that you have heard coming my direction and just carry on down your own path of "let's see how we can mess with Meg today!".

You look at me with disgust, scorn, contempt. You tell me I'm not good enough. You tell me I'm fat. You tell me I'm lazy. You tell me I'm ugly and that you can't understand why Moose has stayed with me all these years. You leave me with the belief that I am not good enough for the people in my life and you have even made me question my abilities as a parent.

I have gotten better at rising above, at lifting myself to a level where you can no longer affect me. The medication helps. But I can still hear you.

You're like the incessant buzzing of a housefly circling my head before perching on my shoulder to take the biggest dump possible. You are always there. I can close my eyes, I can put my fingers in my ears ... but I can still hear you. You don't have the same impact that you once did but, the fact is, I can't escape you.

Every day, I listen to you. Every day, you are there. Every day, you try and bring me down. I just can't get away!

But you know what?! Are you listening, brain? You can suck it! You can take your comments and shove it because I'm making a conscious effort to ignore you and your nastiness from now on. In the words of Sarah from Labyrinth, "you have no power over me".

Cheers,

Me